You & Me, ITS REAL.

You and me , it`s real. My Breath from u. Burden may be overcomed . Evil will be overcomed.
with your love, spirit, I m your beloved one.^^. How about my beloved one? Bless him O lord.

Pretty life with a small piece of happiness from tcc

Second day in tcc^. I feel good^^. Not only because I can take pretty lot of cakes ..but also a harmonious relationship surround me.

I m like a bird which doesn`t know how to fly and all the eagles take care of me and teach me...

God loves me so much. He always gives me the best.(no . its best of the best)

Life is like a journey. Every moment, I taste it earnestly. Every person is meant to come into my life, they are sent by Him and have a purpose on me. If GOD wants to teach me a lesson. He may send an angel to me. This angel may give me whatever I ought to realize--> Maybe sorrow, maybe waterworks, maybe double-minded, maybe brightness, maybe a profound silence, a simple expression of sb`s eyes.

I love my face, because God create me in his own Face.

I love jungle, because he may give me treasures in the darkest nook.

I should love everyone arround me. . .

I should think before do it.

I should do more but complain less..

I should throw satan into dustbin but rise up the cross in the top...

As for my problem I am facing, I should do it positively.

whether avoid? face it with aspiring ? face it in a black face?

Life is like a journey...

thunder.rainstorm.lightning. They r just spontaneousnesss

after that, tomorrow is another day.

life still still.

hoho. why not smile instead of frown. leap up towards our next step^^

Today I laugh, today I cry

I suddenly became a little bit hard-working today. -went to sunday school at 11am. attended English service. served in Chinese service. I just wanna keep on going closer, closer ,closer to GOD.

No matter how many service I attend, I know I am still a dust ,nothing.I am too small. My wholly heart, whatever I have, I give to him, still too little to be seen. I confessed Him as my saviour. I enjoyed the service. Once the pastor touched my head and said: "You have a pure heart and I know u. I love u. There is no need to worry". The time I cried without thinking. I was touched by his understanding and encourage. How he knew I was worrying...

Pulling an exhausted body and going home, to my "surprise", R was there inside the bedroom. "Disaster" I cannot find another word to discribe the scene. dirty, eating on the bed, watching femme movie with loud sound...and with unaccepted content which seems to be above 21 American drama...

I felt like to cry. .

Is it only I regard this house as a home? I clean every inch of the floor Ionclude the toilet. I care about every single thing that about this room and this house. However, my roommates, just anyhow distreat...wilfully.

suddenly a word "ding" came to my mind. I wanna "move" . I wanna live alone and have my own space that I value it as my "home". Now I feel lonly with seeing this house because I don`t have passion to take care of it any more.

It has already been 6 months. 6 months makes me see everybody clearly. I m not sure I will stick on the relatinship or nor. I asked GOD`s solution while he havent answer me yet maybe he is busy to solve others` problem first which is more difficult than mine ...its ok ..I can wait..as long as I know he loves me and will give me an answer soon.

Mom suddenly msn me. with "whats wrong with your handphone".so I just called her.

she said about what did she do the whole day with soft voice. After that she asked me why I didnt update my blog recently. Then I just replied her:"I thought you didnt come to my blog and I just move to another chinese blog"

"........" she mewled....I was heart-broken when I hear this. It had been a long time that I never felt my mother`s collapse... mom I want to hug you at this moment...i miss u so much but I don`t want to speak it out...

Mom is a gentle lady who likes quiet. We have 2 condo houses. one is at 6 floor and another one is at 12-13 floors. My sis and me and maid lives at6 and she lives in the top . Dad seldom goes home. and I m now studying in singapore. However, still, when the curtain of the night falls, she goes back to her "queen house" as usual. She wants to be a strong woman. Never show her weakness in front of others that she need help or asking someone just acc her. I knew the time I called her, she , her alone, was lying on the bed with silk quilt wrapping around her. ... reding lamp on the tea table with dim light...newspaper or magzines were on her leg.. she was crying there...a 42-years-old lady. she was so lonly....

How I want to be with you ..How I want to share everything happened with u. How I want to stay beside u during the rest of my life....I cannot support her to cry. otherwise we would cry a lot tonight...

Mom, everyday I pray for you more than myself...I do everything here just for entertain you. and prove your daughter is a good daugher for who rised up by a wise mother. I didnt ask GOD for more.I didnt even ask for good husband or boyfriend but Just for you can be happy every single day...

Now it is 12.00 am ...a new day starts.

Lets come on !~

Tears all past and left to yesterday!~

God~ I have u to be my backup. Everything U say,I will do my best!!!! GHAMBATHAI^^^

Peaceful day.

Long time never feel such peace, I meant to keep myself busy after going back from China. Therefore, I may not "swim in the blue sea".

I feel myself lucky. A lot of coincident thing came in front of me.

I went to ASTON before POLY for safety.
I know Gheko in ASTON.
He took me to FA.
I find people are happy & warm-hearted there. Especially, their songs are all touching. I melted..
They wanted to take me to CHURCH. I wanna have a try.
I was shocked the first time I went there and don`t wanna go there anymore.
Didn`t understand why they scream and cry...and speak tong language like wildnesses.
But couldn`t reject friends` invitations, so I kept on going there with unwillness and innocence.
Soon, I would like to sing with them.
I feel somehow I have power when I shout a name called"GOD".
Why Bible is so holy? I began to read . Grady bought me a Bible . I thanked him.
Yes, bible is holy. I realised.
I learnt to PRAY. just like what I talk with my father. Even it is informal..I confided everthing to a Holy person that Ive never seen.
Of course I doubt whether he is real or not. When I was still failure after I prayed, I thought he maybe a deaf and blind...

Those innocent time passed by...
I accept him as he cares about me. Give me a happy family in China. A good school. A good church and people in side the church. HE gives me a fit healthy body and harmonious relationship.

However, when I decide to confess him. I saw some Christian were so bad and selfish. I was confused ....and doubt again...
Mom told me, "if you always look at people, you will fail. You should look at yourself and your GOD ONLY. You cannot control others` behavious but you can control yours. " I thanked my mom even she was a free thinker, she still supported me and guide my way.

I changed myself to go to another service . FRom YRC-->BES. for better understanding.

I keep on believe in Him. and This sunday , I will be baptized. I know it is Him who give me such a PEACEFUL DAY.

And those consident thing is so-called FAITH.

haha !~ first blog in English!~

say my "hi" to everybody here~ finally .today i open up my blog here. actually i plan to have a E nglish blog but didn`t make it because I am so lazy... haha . not bad . It is not too late. By the way, I would like to share my story with you all. I hope we can walk together when happiness and sadness are there. YO YO . PLAUSE TO A NEW STAR -----Rachel- yu fei..